Ballad of the Cumberland Darter

[Chorus]
No susanae, we did not catch that fish
But we caught an Arrow Darter and a couple of Notropis

It hadn’t rained for quite a while
The creek bed was all dry
Just puddles and pools here and there
“Don’t drink it or you’ll die”

[Chorus]

The fish were no where to be found,
Our spirits began to sag.
Then Casper found sagitta
And caught him in a bag

[Chorus] 

We went right and they went left,
To take home that fine catch
But we had the Bride, so we headed on
Down to the Rooster Scratch

[Chorus]

Bob says he’s a Neanderthal
But is don’t sound right to me
Cause he can cut your hair, fix your teeth,
And do minor surgery

[Chorus]

Bob told us of the peppers,
His pumpkins and his corn
While the couple on the bar stools
Were lookin’ at some porn

[Chorus]

Bob gave us a ‘clear water’ drink
And we each took our turn
Corn mash and rye, so sweet and smooth
It didn’t even burn

[Chorus]

Not many fish, we had bad luck
But at least we’re not the squirrel
Well the Bride she drank so much,
I thought that she might hurl

[Chorus]

We made it back without a scratch
It’s the end now of my rhyme
I never thought that fishin’
Could be such a wild time. 

[Chorus]

...with thanks and apologies to Stephen Foster